never pass up the opportunity to pet a dog
foods dangerous to dogs:
- raw bread dough
- grapes and raisins
- onions and garlic
- macadamia nuts
- raw salmon
- xylitol (artificial sweeteners)
if you have a dog please reblog thisYou don’t need to have a dog, everyone just reblog this maybe ok yes
It has come to my attention that there are fully legal adults who are not familiar with this, who do not know what to do when they hear it, and indeed, were born after it came out.
This is unacceptable.
It is irrevocably tattooed into the brain of anyone vaguely associated with Western culture who was old enough to form cognizant memories in the mid 90s. And yes, we can all do the dance. I guarantee you Dean Winchester can do the dance. Bobby can do the dance. Sherlock can do the dance. Tony Stark has made sure all his robots can do the dance.
And all of you over the age of 25 already know what it is before you press play.
I was hoping it wasn’t this.
I PRESSED PLAY AND MY BODY JUST STARTED DOING THE DANCE FROM SHEER MUSCLE MEMORY
I PLAYED 4 SECONDS OF THIS AND MY LITTLE SISTER STOPPED WHAT SHE WAS DOING AND STARTED DANCING, AS DID MY MOTHER THIS IS SOME VOODOO SHIT
*sees a dog*
me: holy shit
Me at parties
Dear Future Daughter:
1) When you’re at some party, chain smoking on the roof with some strange girl with blue hair and exorbitant large dark eyes, ask her about her day. I promise you, you won’t regret it. Often times you’ll find the strangest of people have the most captivating of stories to tell.
2) Please, never mistake desire for love. Love will engulf your soul, whilst desire will emerge as acid, slowly making it’s way through your veins, gradually burning you from the inside out.
3) No one is going to fucking save you, anything you’ve read or heard otherwise is bullshit.
4) One day a boy is going to come along who’s touch feels like fire and who’s words taste like vanilla, when he leaves you, you will want to die. If you know anything at all, know that it is only temporary.
5) Your mental health comes before school baby, always. If its midnight, and you have an exam the next day but your hands have been shaking for the past hour and a half and you’re not so sure you want to be alive anymore, pull out that carton of Ben and Jerry’s and afterwards, go the fuck to bed. So what if you get a 68% on the exam the next day? You took care of yourself and at the end of the day that will always come before a high test score. To hell with anyone who tells you differently.
once i was babysitting my neighbor’s 6 year old and she asked me why i was so ugly and without thinking i said “i’m you from the future” and she cried for like 30 minutes
I see you, Fox News.